A Note From Stephen

Hello loyal freedom lovers.
I must take this time to explain to you my feelings on Ally's current and deplorable situation, and Alex's discouraging behaviour. Alex, you should be helping your sister by doing her laundry and making her dinner. All those frozen Mars bars and constant uniform of dirty underwear are a blatant cry for help. She doesn't want a hand-up, she wants a hand-out. So hand her out some delicious sandwiches or Pastaria brand microwave pastas. Wash her smelly and usually threadbare thongs or better yet, go out and buy her some.
And Ally, my love. The light of my life. Don't worry. You will be back on your feet again. And until then, you come to Papa Colbert and let me take care of things. I'll massage your tired feet and brush your beautiful blonde hair. We'll watch movies together on the futon and make popcorn.
Faithfully Yours,
Stephen William Henry Harrison Colbert

Yep, I'm alive - From Ally

Good People
As you are aware, by a very insensitive Alex, I lost my job. This was 3 weeks ago. And I have JUST found the courage to talk to you all ('you all' being, what...Erin? Maybe Alex, when she's lonely and needs to feel cool?)
Anyways, let me fill you in as to what I've been up to. I am one unhealed-scab away from living in a van down by the river like my hero, Matt Foley. (So to speak - I do, infact, let my scabs heal). I usually start my day bright and early at the crack of noon. This is much different than waking up at 7am like I was growing accustomed to. I usually stretch a bit and then slide out of bed. I walk downstairs in my underwear (cause everyone else in our house is at work/school/out being productive) and get something to eat. Breakfast is over by hours and I'm well into lunch, so I usually combine the two meals. When I had a job, my breakfasts were usually a bowl of cereal and a tea, maybe an apple. This morning, for instance, I had 2 large cinnamon rolls from Bloor Street's own Cobb Bakery (amazing) microwaved, to which I add butter, then a couple of Vietnemese Coffees (this of course is equal parts espresso and Eagle Brand sweetened condensed milk, over ice). Then I microwaved lasagna from last night (two servings) and several Pillsbury Snowman cookies. Then I take a break and watch some tv. I usually watch the Food Network or Life. MTV during the day is shit and W makes me depressed (UNLESS What Not To Wear is on) and MUCH MUSIC is dead to me, so my television never lands on channel 29. Around now, 1:30pm, I get hungry for a snack. I'm still in my underwear, so I walk down the hall to our sewing room where we keep our freezer. I have a box of 100 mini-Mars bars frozen in there. It's the only way I'll eat them. So, I'll bring like, 8 back to my iBook and eat them while I read DListed.com and PerezHilton.com and Vice and such. Then I get tired, so I have a nap. I wake up at 4 and shower (mostly I don't) and either a) go to my serving job or b) go to my bartending job or c) get my ass up to my boyfriend's house. When I get there (he's usually at school) I check my email and take a nap on his bed. He'll come home and we'll make dinner or go out for dinner and then we'll come home, and I'll wish I had more frozen Mars bars. Oh, I forgot to mention that we watch Jeopardy! at 7:30pm and I shout out the answers like a senile old lady. I go home to my house (if I don't fall asleep at his house) and watch TV till about 3am. What am I watching? Let me tell you what I watched last night:
The Simpsons, Family Guy, Intervention, What Not To Wear, Intervention (again), One Flew Over The Cuckoos Nest (2 hrs) then capped it all of with some Iron Chef America (last nights secret ingredient? Ground Beef. Sheesh, are they getting lazy or what)
So yeah. I am jobless (sort of). I spend all my time on the internet, eating, eating while looking at the internet, checking my phone for messages (always none) and watering my African Violets and feeding my fish (Violet - I named her that mostly cause all the Mars bars meld memories together, so if I leave a post-it that says "FEED VIOLET" that could mean feed the fish, feed the plants, etc.)
In conclusion, I will be updating my dreams again, cause let me tell you...this non-stop roller coaster of depression, isolation, loss of motivation, and weight gain has been giving me nightmares the likes of which you could not imagine. One of them involved me stabbing a doll and then shooting anyone who tried to stop me. Is that messed up or what?!?!
Also, when I googled 'mars bar', I got a picture of a Jakalope. I don't get it, but let me tell you - the first pet I get thats not a fish, I am naming it Mars Bar.
See you at 12 - Ally

From Alex- the new Ally

So since Allison has fallen into a deep depression from her lack of job and 8 hours of msn, dlisted, youtube, perez hilton, and any other time filling websites, she has failed to commit to her daily - and boring- dream blogs.
So I will be brief with mine knowing no one will read this....
I dreamt I found a black peacoat and a large suede light brown bag at my Nana's cottage. It was a beaute. So I'm on the hunt to live out my dream.
Suck on that, nightmares, I had a boring but inspirational dream. Inspirational might not be the right word... buuuut.
And while I have time to write - in photoshop class- might I add a little story about fat people and how fucking lazy they are? Last night at the gym a really really - I'm talking verging 300 lbs - woman sat her ass on the rowing machine and watched an entire episode of Ugly Betty just sitting and laughing outloud. And occasionally would pump her legs slowly I guess to feel like the $60/ month she pays for her membership isn't just for lounging around on equpiments chewing a towel over her shoulders and watching TV in the company of sweaty women. WTF. I really have no idea why I'm still ranting to myself over this....

From Alex

Last night me and Allison had a grapefruit fight while watching Kenny vs. Spenny.
We completely destroyed the living room and there's grapefruit pulp everywhere (oh, this is real, dream is coming later). Anyways, much grafruit in hair/ on walls and after we catch our breaths we decide to leave it because our roommate Jenn is a very clean and particular person, and, coincidentaly, out at the bar. So we are quite giddy walking up the stairs and I go to sleep. My dream was I walked down the stairs, laughing to myself and looking for Jenn and downstairs is decorated with SO MUCH Christmas decorations. So I go to Jenn's room to see why she's decorating in November and in her bathroom is Jenn, and my Mom and Dad. And Jenn looks like she's just finished crying. So my parents decided to come visit our place and decorate (because they're so thoughtful) at 3am and found the place the way it was, and went to yell at Jenn. This was crazy and Jenn was sobbing and looking at me like "How could you?"
And then we flashed to another scene and there were lots of puppies and dogs playing in my backyard and they all looked like Ellie and I was happy and forgot about Jenn getting all the heat...